Heir Poll

Time to pick the ninth heir! Everyone here is technically still a ghost, but they are hard to tell apart that way so I’ve used CAS shots.

Vote for your choice in the comments or at Boolprop!

Chapter 44 – Crushing

Hey look it is my favorite transgender, transhuman, trans-opaque townie! My game would be so boring without glitches.

Partially invisible gal/fella/robot: “Here I am, all alone, autonomously drawn to listen to this teenage ghost’s tuneless warbling. Where is everyone else? Why am I the only one who has to suffer. Back in my day people were friendlier. Back in my day you kept your friends close and your enemies so close they were actually overlapping with you. The kids these days have forgotten how to form a Crowd.”

But look my midsectionless man/woman/machine! The crowd lives on! The youth of the town follow in their forefather’s and foremother’s collective footstepsstandingarounds! They eschew personal space! They seek a return to the days before the Big Bang when all matter occupied a single point, every molecule squished up against each other, every planet and person and plant and animal coexisting all at once! (apologies to Calvino)

This mini-crowd outside the school includes all the current Dodger kids and most of their (potential) future spouses. The ghosts make the whole thing look like those crazy jello molds with different kinds of fruit stuck in them, no?

Unfortunately (well, luckily) this crowd dispersed soon after I took these photos. Sure, the new generation has taken up the art of crowding, but they are only doing it ironically.

Longtime readers will know that I am shockingly bad at this game. The fact that the Dodger house is currently at full capacity is compounding my ineptitude eightfold, so I am eager to get the kids married off and out of the house so I can focus on the heir (who shall it be??) and the imminent (triumphant?) end to the legacy.

Hospital Gown Guy: “Psst. Did you hear about the Dodgers? They just wander around the town looking lost all day. I’m pretty sure none of them even bathe anymore. ”

Last chapter the eldest eligible Dodger, Pilfer, met this guy, Frankie Knack, while milling around outside the stadium. After a few sessions of flirting they had worked themselves up to romantic interest status. But then Frankie became a young adult and the next thing you know…

Pilfer: “You got married?? You haven’t even been a young adult for one full day! I thought we totally hit it off.  I thought we had a future together!”

Frankie Wheloff-Knack: “Uh, I can explain.”

Frankie: “…but it might take a while. How about you and me grab dinner?”

His wife Lakesha (the lady right behind him): *is totally unconcerned*

At the restaurant…

Pilfer: “So you’re saying this whole marriage thing wasn’t your idea? It was arranged? By your overbearing aunt Storyana Progessionton?”

Frankie: “Exactly. I knew you’d understand.”

Pilfer: “So that means you’ll have no problem divorcing your new wife immediately and marrying me instead.”

Frankie: *chokes on lobster thermidor*

Meanwhile, Pilfer’s little sister Steal is hanging out with her BFF Alexander Bull.

Steal: “Omg Alex I can’t wait until I’m like the most evil supervillian ever and you are totally my henchman it will be so much funl!”

Alexander’s Entire Family: *disapproves*

The Entire Staff of the Restaurant Where Frankie and Pilfer are Dining Extra-maritally: *disapproves*

Pilfer’s twin bro Rob is the first of his siblings to get a first kiss. His love interest is Trish Knack, Frankie’s younger sister. What can I say – it’s a small town.

JELLO MOLD!!

Back to the evil triplets. Sneak has been playing her guitar around town, hoping to meet some new people.

But all she meets is disapproval. From this lady. From the unique individual at the very beginning of the chapter. Why is everyone in this town so dour? I don’t know. Maybe it’s because all their stuff gets stolen all the time?

Finally Sneak met a young man who didn’t disapprove at all: Marc Coddle-Prudence. He’s a bit funny looking, but Sneak isn’t one to get all caught up in aesthetics. She’s a business lady. Her business is evil, sure, but she intends to keep meticulous records and balance the bankbook at every turn.

Marc: “So you’re a thief? That’s cool. What do you steal?”

Sneak: “A kiss!”

Her sister Take is way more interested in fishing than kissing.

When she’s not at the edge of a pond or lake, she jokes around with her friend Alice Whelohff. Who is, yes, the little sister of Frankie Knack’s wife. Like I said – it’s a small town.

Take: “So then she was all like oh Marc that’s so efficient and billable and then they kissed. It was gross!

Alice : “Ooh I bet they made a face like this!!”

Steal and Alexander have their first fight after a shocking revelation about his new teenage trait.

Steal: “You’re good??!!”

Alexander: “It’s not my fault. It just happened. You know how confusing puberty is. All those hormones. It’s easy to be led down the wrong path.”

Alexander: “I can still be your henchman. I’ll just look the other way when you do all the evil stuff. Maybe I’ll give people a hug after you beat them up. But I won’t get in your way or anything.”

Steal: “You disgust me.”

But by the next day they’d reconciled. And then some.

Take: “hmm…”

Take: “So then she was like oh Alexander I don’t care if you’re good I will order you to do terrible, evil things anyway and if you don’t do them I will destroy everything you have ever loved. And then they kissed. It was kinda sweet I guess.”

Alice: “Ooh I bet they made a face like…”

“…this!”

Rob scores another first by proposing to his girlfriend Trish as soon as they are both of age.

Rob: “With this magical gnome, I thee wed.”

Yes I spent like five minutes trying to line up that shot. Anyway, at the same time outside…

Pilfer: “So you’ll call it off with Lakesha, right?”

Frankie: “Sure. I’ll do it this very afternoon.”

and then…

BUT…

Oh no!!! Want to find out what happens next? Me too! Please help me out by voting in the HEIR POLL.